Roles in family

In every family each person has a role. Sometimes family get a black-sheep one who is always in trouble. I wasn’t the black sheep in my family sometimes they might of wonder with all the trouble I found my self in to for unwise choices. I owe my outcome to my grandma because she was there when everyone else wanted to leave. I also played the same role in her family with my uncle we lived with. I been married a little over 2 years, and since I been married I have been playing the peace maker. I guess those role fits me almost perfectly because I am always interceding for people. Sometimes my husband and I feel like the family and some of the close friends of the family expect us to be superheroes or something. They seem to think e can fix all the problems. For the most we do pretty good at solving problems, and I am pretty good at keeping the peace in the family.
When mom got sick with the stroke I threw my hands up with his sister, I got sick of interceding for her and her lieing, and saying ugly hurtful things to mom and the rest of us. Mom passed away and now everyone is expecting hubby and I to fix everything it a little overwhelming for both of us at time.
I know Yeshua has told us how to act to one another, and I know what the Torah instructs us to, so once again I find myself playing this same role and trying to understand everyone side. I think my husband loves and hates this aspect of my personality, and I can understand because I don’t always look at his side and then side with him. I try to look at the other person side and understand where they are coming from is is hard.
G-d told our Husbands to love us the way Yeshua Loved the Church. I think this can be impossible with a wife like me, I am not a horrible wife but I am probably a hard person to live with because I am always defending or trying to bring peace into situations. G-d has given us all gifting, and sometimes those gifts are harder to love and want.
Last night his sister called because of Dad getting upset with her boyfriend or husband who lift her. Mom had given this guy something according to her and dad wanted it back and she said no, okay I understand if it’s a gift it should stay with the person. Now at the same time I understand dad, he wants to defend his daughter. No matter how much he gets mad or upset with his daughter he still wants to protect her and keep her name from being smeared. I told her to give it a few days and let dad calm down. I think right now everyone in that situation is running on high emotions and we attack those who are closest to. I am not saying her boyfriend or her haven’t done horrible things but in a way I see what dad doing as a fatherly thing to do. It’s his child and you know dad still loves her even through he said stupid things but so did she. I explained to her you guys have both spoken out of angry and give it some time.
Dad is not like G-d who when He gets angry he don’t stay stupid things, dad don’t have that same control as G-d. G-d no matter what we do he still there, yes he does convict us and allow us to suffer consequences for our behavior. My husband sister I believe she needs to fall flat on her face and not be bailed out from dad or the rest of the family, she needs to learn the hard way how to manage her money and family. I know this is mean but she been bailed out a lot and I believe there is a time when G-d steps aside from us as his children and says, okay learn the hard way. Since we are normally the type who picks the hard way to learn things it happens more often then I’d like to admit. I have learned plenty of things the hard way, and now I know better kindof like good used tape drives
. I have now said okay my role is peace maker, intercessor for the family, so I will have to get along with sis, and pray for her and Pray G-d helps me and gives me the words to speak to her and the rest of them.