Being thankful

Sometimes it very hard to look at what we have to be thankful for. I know right now I been upset with my mom for not wanting to come to my graduation and upset with myself for being disappointed even though I knew she wouldn’t be there. Yet I am still hurt I wish my mom was there for me, but she isn’t. Sometimes I just have to be happy my husband and father in law will be there for me. This weekend my husband nephew surprised me I let him know I was going to be graduating soon, and he wanted to know when. He wants to come. It’s amazing how other people want to celebrate the fact I am finally done with college, even those how don’t know me well.
I have to admit, I am very tempted to send the Bible college I went to for five years and accomplished nothing but a pretty much ruined faith and self-esteem my transcript with see I am smart enough to go to college and graduate, oh and by the way with above a 3.0. Nope I am not stupid and by the way G-d can use me and my talent and has used me. Frankly all I needed was a environment that was encouraging and that was welling to find out what my struggle with and help me learn how to learn correctly. I have been doing the University of Phoenix Flexnet, online program. I have grown so much, and to be honest I might have to leave the school and I am scared to leave them, because I feel safe there. I have learned a lot, grown a lot. The first encounter there was with their enrollment counselor who encourage me to try one class, and first night of class gave me a mustard seed. Never have I been told I was to stupid because I have a learning disability, at least not yet. It’s amazing how a secular college has done me way more good then a christian college. Wow…… I studied just as hard at the UOP as I did in Bible college but the difference was I haven’t gone into any of my assignments feeling like a total idiot. Now I am not saying I haven’t had any challenging professor who I will admit I dislike a bunch. One I dislike because in each class he expected more and more from me. How terrible! But to be honest I do the same thing with my children I work with, I expect a lot from them especially once I know what they are capable of. So I have school.
I found out today I will be graduating with my upper degree counselor at UOP, I am hoping I can remain there.
I can be thankful hubby and I have a PS3 which I can play when I need a break from school work. Trust me I need a lot of them. The last 3 classes were all math based remind me to never do that again.
I will have to start looking for colleges hopefully I find a good one if I have to leave. I been encouraged to go to a couple of different Christian colleges but to be honest it leaves me more fearful and worried I would not succeed because my experience has been if you don’t learn in a traditional style you tend to get put down.
So I can be thankful that at the UOP I have grown and if I have to leave I will take the skills I have gained and a bunch of prayer.
I can be thankful for my grandma who wants to come but doctor is telling her maybe not. I hope she listen to the doctor, we can get together later, maybe drive down for Thanksgiving. For those who think Online or Flexnet through the UOP isn’t really doing work, try it yourself and see how easy it is. I am not saying its not doable but I am doing just as much work in one month as some of my college friends in 4 months sometimes even more. I have had my friend help me with some of the things I need to discuss and been told now several times I never had to do this or that. It’s funny, because in 5 weeks I ended up doing more work in some of the math based classes then she did with her entire thing. Grant it I won’t learn anything about ministering to people but you know what there is ministry opportunities.
I am also thankful for the people at my congregation being supportive of hubby and I.